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The ‘omitted’ Question!

By Mike Cunningham On September 20th, 2012 at 9:58 am

On the BBC Today Programme this morning, David Laws, Minister for Schools, was defending the Government’s policy on the ‘Pupil Premium’, which is itself a bit of a misnomer, as it really is a bribe, but that is perhaps another story. He was also asked about the strange ‘apology’ from the fatally-wounded Nick Clegg, LIb-Dem Party leader, and if he associated himself with either the policy, or the apology.

However, the question which was not asked, but perhaps should have been, is as follows:-

As you are both a confirmed thief, having stolen some £40,000; as well as a liar, having disguised this theft to cover up a sexual relationship with another man, do you think yourself morally justified in continuing to keep the role of an M.P., as well as now a Junior Minister of the Coalition Government?

Fair enough…

By Mike Cunningham On September 11th, 2012 at 6:58 pm

In that case, I’ll be content to be labelled a ‘BIGOT’

Pie and, er, Mash; anyone?

By Mike Cunningham On August 29th, 2012 at 5:47 pm

This site is supposed to be so over-the-top that it is naturally hilarious, but when the Daily Mash posts on modern politics, it seems as though reality beats satire every time!

RADICAL boundary changes by the Conservative party will make it mathematically impossible for Labour to win an election, it has emerged.

Under David Cameron’s proposed new constituency boundaries, Up North – which includes traditional Labour strongholds Manchester, Liverpool and Newcastle – will elect a single MP.

Meanwhile David Cameron’s home town of Chipping Norton would be split into 27 constituencies, three of them representing areas of Cameron’s house.

Cameron said: “The needs of my bathroom are very different to those of my kitchen or spare room, and I am delighted our electoral system will now recognise those differences.

“Northerners however all share the common life goals of having sex in car parks and acquiring fried meat in cardboard buckets, so there is less need for detailed administration in their foggy, marsh-like region.”

The Prime Minister has promised that the 2015 election will be a more spectacular affair, with polling stations moving from primary schools to more impressive locations such as golf clubs and opera houses.

He also plans to introduce a ‘two names two votes’ policy under which anyone with a double-barrelled surname may legally vote twice.

The logistics of the election would also change, with responsibility for the ballot passing to private firm Optimum Democracy.

An Optimum spokesman explained:  “Voters can buy the Premium Ballot Paper, which will list all the candidates, or stick with the Free and Easy option, which will only show the party that won the previous election.”

“The ballot will also be the greenest ever, with any unused votes being recycled and sold off to the highest bidder.”

Less than the awful truth; unfortunately!

By Mike Cunningham On August 19th, 2012 at 9:50 am

The scene is the London home of Tony Blair, guarded of course by armed police officers, with a full ‘security’ team monitoring all visitors.

A man then approaches the front door, dressed in a T-shirt bearin g the words ‘Foundation for the Glorification of Tony Blair’, saying he has come to do the initial measurements for the new ‘Stained Glass Window’ which the Foundation is presenting to the ex-Prime Minister, After a few words with the copper on the front door, he is allowed in, and proceeds to measure for the afore-mentioned window (pictured below). He also mentions to one of the police guards that the ‘Foundation’ is actually in touch with the Vatican to have the Blessed Tony made into a saint, presumably before he dies.

The actual programme is called ‘The Revolution will be Televised’ and features similar stunts with George Osborne, Philip Green (TopShop) and Boris Johnson.

Apart from finding the whole idea quite funny, I have however one query, and one comment:

Why are Metropolitan Police Offcers delegated to the protection of a multi-millionaire ex-politician?; and:-

Tony’s hands are not spread out in a blessing, but are in fact begging for lots more cash so Cherie can add to her shoe collection.



Courtesy of the PayWalled Sunday Times


Armed Forces…4 Hammond….0

By Mike Cunningham On August 13th, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Quotation from a letter sent to the Telegraph by the ‘Defence Secretary’:-

SIR – As the London 2012 Olympics draw to a close, I want to express my heartfelt thanks on behalf of the Government and of the British people to the men and women of our Armed Forces.

Their efficient, friendly and cheerful intervention to deliver security to the Games has been one of London 2012’s great successes. Not only has it ensured a safe and successful Games, but it has been the largest exercise in defence engagement since the Second World War, putting thousands of troops in direct contact with the citizens who pay for defence through their taxes.

We have been reminded that we can rely on these men and women not only to protect us from our enemies abroad, but also to provide resilience to our society at home.

Philip Hammond MP (Con)

Explanation, translation & commentary:-

The Armed Forces’ presence was actually determined by the singular failure of Group Four Services (G4S) to supply the guaranteed number of ‘security monitor staff’ as they (G4S) had relied on the old idea of paying the minimum possible wage to anyone who signed up, who had gone through the ludicrous ‘training procedure’ without actually bursting into gales of laughter, and had the added indignity of having a CRB check done on their whole background. When the volunteer security teams did attend for a trial, they found no planning, no place to sleep, no uniforms, no idea!

As was foreseen by anyone with more than single-figure IQ levels, the recruitment process dissolved into chaos, and the over-paid senior execs. of G4S, this massive public company went running, sobbing, to the Home Secretary a week before the Games were due to commence, to tell them that they hadn’t got more than a third of the numbers required; and of course, the whole Cabinet, from Cameron down to the bottle-washers of the Lib_Dems, thanked their lucky stars that Hammond hadn’t actually fired all the soldiers, marines and sailors that he, along with his predecessor Liam Fox, had originally wanted to.

The Soldiers, Marines, Sailors and Airmen who served during the Olympic Games venues did not volunteer, they were ordered to attend: cancelling holidays, leave, family commitments, and they did so because they are trained to obey lawful commands: they demonstrated that the Military can do more than is required, but to state that their intervention was cheerful is to write the lie in red ink.

The slashing of the Defence budgets is but yet another in the sins and signs which will be held against this stinking Coalition when at last they come to judgement at an Election, and it is also a judgement upon the voters of this Nation that one of the two main Parties will be returned to power, because those same voters do not think before casting their votes, but act like herded sheep, corralled by a mute sheepdog.

p.s. By the way, Mr. Hammond, the last time I checked, I am proud to own that I, along with you, are British Subjects of Her Majesty! If one accepts EU rulings, we may be termed ‘citizens’, but fortunately, not in my home!




..Because their lips are moving!

By Mike Cunningham On August 13th, 2012 at 10:22 am

It is a certain truth that, in order to guarantee failure to a project, an idea or even a belief; one must import the voices of politicians who wish to place their ownership of aforementioned idea firmly before the public (and of course, voters) gaze.

If anyone believes that they can jump higher, run faster, row more vigorously than their fellow athletes, they will have had that belief for a long time. Some might even state that the impetus to do better is in their genetic make-up. Speaking purely personally, I don’t believe I have a competitive molecule in my entire D.N.A system, and whilst many might try to compete in a multitude of endeavours, without the basic genetic make-up which pushes them further than mere mortals; I just don’t comprehend that drive at all. In short, Sport, and sporting endeavours, and more exactly watching sports, bores me stiff. But I can understand that I am in a miniscule minority, especially when it comes to major sporting activities such as the Olympics.

My late brother, who was himself the sports fanatic in our household, said as much one day after he asked me if I had watched some (to him) very important World Cup match. When I replied that I had in fact been watching a documentary on the African Fish Eagle, his reply was to the effect that ‘I had no soul’!  But that’s just me!

However, I commenced this small diatribe with regard to politicians trying to muscle in on anything which they believe will give them leverage, or votes, or both. So it is with all the tiny-minded so-called  leaders, or would-be leaders, of our various political parties. We watch as Mr. Slippery himself, our unlamented Prime Minister, welcomes the victorious Mohammed Farah into his ‘hunger summit’ in Downing Street. As I have never met M. Farah, nor am I likely to, all I could give him are these words of warning when he listens to David Cameron; ‘Always get everything down in writing; every promise, every theory, every extravagant guarantee; whether it be about sport in general, or the supposed hunger in the Sahel region of Africa’. Then, when disappointment arises, as surely it will, because all politicians use people, and then discard them if they are inconvenient, he can point to the words he wrote down when those extravagant promises were made; and be able to call our slippery Prime Minister a liar to his face. Next we watch Ed Miliband as he makes a complete fool of himself next to two students as he prepared to lie to several thousand voters in Corby. Someone should have reminded our Ed that that type of gesture is frowned upon by the Party he professes to lead. And of course there is Nick Clegg, who has won new praise for winning the title, against strong opposition; of Britain’s most Untrustworthy Political Leader.

As with athletics, or rowing, or any other of the multitude of sports highlit in the past fortnight, I hope to remind you, dear ATW reader, that they are only in politicians’ eyes, because of the hope that some of the glory, or the soundness of the individual athlete’s campaigns, rubs off onto the shoulders of the politician in question. Having watched with a cynical eye for many years the antics of our political class as they once more prove that, as a class, they are amongst the most untrustworthy in the Universe, I trust that all of our athletes come away from the brief encounters with politicians whilst using the same gesture; which of course is wiping their hands to get rid of the slime!

Lost for words, or just an answer?

By Mike Cunningham On August 8th, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Again and again, from an annoyed Gillian Duffy to a sick and distraught ‘Anna‘, politicians like Brown and Cameron just do not have the answers to questions which are upmost in the real Public’s mind!

The truly high cost of ‘Democracy’

By Mike Cunningham On July 12th, 2012 at 3:20 pm

As some ATW readers may remember, I was so annoyed by the publication of the Parliamentary Expenses Theft Scandal, for theft it truly was, I considered standing for Parliament myself; but decided not to run, for reasons both public and private. However, I noticed a small newsclip stating that the Home Secretary was considering more advertising to allow the Police Commissioner Elections to become more well-known, as well as to gain more candidates.

I will honestly state that I did consider asking my fellow Durham voters to nominate me, but hastily placed that thought into cold storage after discovering that the Deposit amounts to £5,000.00.

Five thousand pounds! Stroll on, they must be having a laugh!

If ‘Their lips are moving!’ is the answer; guess the question.

By Mike Cunningham On July 10th, 2012 at 4:05 pm

Remploy Ideals:- They set out our primary task as the creation of employment opportunities for people with severe disabilities. Giving disabled people a real and worthwhile job gives them the money, self-respect and independence, which is the right of every citizen.

I write of a blind, dogged determination to adhere to ‘Austerity’ and of decisions to cut spending wherever such ‘Savings’ have been identified. I write of a Government which, in truth, has lost all idea of a spirit of generosity, of any idea of human behaviour; in a blind pursuit of a path chosen on purely political grounds; with their use of words which disguise the true nature of their intentions.

Some ATW readers may be familiar with the existence of Remploy factories. All over this country, people, of varying disabilities, both physical and mental, have been able to gain employment which stretches their ambitions without stretching their disabilities. From a small beginning under Labour in 1946, Remploy has grown to an organisation which gives gainful and satisfying employment to over 10,000 people.

Watching and listening to the smug tones of Maria Miller, the ‘Remploy Killer’, I noticed only one thing; a blind determination that she, and her Cabinet colleagues are right, and everyone else is wrong. I have been, a long time ago, a visitor to a Remploy factory, and I can assure any politicians that they don’t consider themselves ‘segregated’ or even ‘disadvantaged’; but work alongside fellow employees who can relate to their fellow workers.

It is true that most Remploy factories run at a loss, but should we be stating that this should be judged not in monetary terms; but in fact in the knowledge that these people are deserving of our support, whatever the cost, whatever the subsidy, whatever the annoyance  which may be generated towards a group of self-serving millionaires masquerading as a Coalition Government.

Not just your cash, but your reputation.

By Mike Cunningham On June 30th, 2012 at 7:59 am

The Words of ‘Chairman’ Andrew Mitchell Sec. State, and his Dept. for International Development.

‘aid from the British people is achieving extraordinary results, ‘

‘The UK is the highest aid giver of all countries in the G8’

“The Coalition Government is the first government in history to set out, in black and white in the Spending Review, clear plans to honour the UK’s long standing promises on aid.”

“Following relentless pressure from the Coalition Government, the EU is already reforming the way it spends aid, making it more transparent, results-focused and targeted at the poorest people.”

Aid from Britain will be badged with a Union Flag overseas, as a clear symbol that it comes from the United Kingdom.

My own feelings, for what they are worth, is that as long as evidence is published such as this incredibly detailed exposé of incompetence, corruption, malfeasance-in-office and downright theft, are that the whole DfID shebang should be disbanded forthwith, any projects summarily would down, senior DfID staffers fired for sheer incompetence, and Mitchell forced to run for cover behind his buddy Cameron’s coat-tails.