By Mahons On July 14th, 2016 at 9:22 pm
In a second journalistic coup, ATW has secured Hillary Clinton’s speech announcing her Vice Presidential Pick, though we had to pay $2 million for it cause she gets paid a lot for her speeches. Excerpts follow:
“My fellow Americans, this is a historic moment. In the face of right wing conspiracy, poor color choices on pant suits and people who don’t like baby seals I am announcing my choice for Vice President….Bill Gates!
He brings many positives to my historic campaign. His background will help me with my server and software issues. His philanthropy is legendary and we can afford to upgrade Camp David. Plus I need a guy named Bill to help advance my career.
By selecting Bill Gates I should easily capture the rich white male vote that has eluded me thus far. I respect all demographics (voice becoming shrill), especially those WHO VOTE FOR ME! Donald Trump is too reckless, thank God. Any other Republican with half a brain would have beaten me. Luckily, most of them lacked that half. (Uncomfortable moment as frozen smile ensues).
Thank and may whatever God you worship or ignore bless you.
By Mahons On July 14th, 2016 at 12:53 pm
ATW has secured the leaked Trump speech announcing his Vice Presidential Pick, excerpts below:
“Good Morning my fellow Americans! Thank you for applauding the superiority of me. Very fabulous. As you know from reading my book the Art of the Deal, I go yuuuuge! So when it came to honor someone by letting them stand close to me and bask in my glory as Vice President, I could choose no one better than Hulk Hogan! He is yuuuge! Right? Much bigger than Crooked Hillary.
Hulk is a fighter! A man who knows the arena. A World Champion which will clearly help with foreign policy. He is also not Muslim, Mexican, Cinese or some other kind of Loser. Plus his sex tape is tremendous. People who know are congratulating me on my choice. Except for Chris Christie who is also yuuuuge, but in a more McDonalds Way. Love the Chicken nuggets, we will make China super size their orders. I have many Chinese friends. Wonderful people, might all have jaundice but they know how to build a wall. Mine will be Greater cause size matters!
Hulk will be great, not as great as me but still great. People tell me I could beat him in wrestling, but I don’t wear gym shorts so we will just have to say I would have crushed him. I have better hair. Everyone knows that. It is time to make America great again, even though I will have to move into a smaller house. Hulk will be there with me, cause he represents the dignity, thoughtfulness and class that made this nation worthy of my being born here. Also he is not Muslim. Super, super guy. Very much so. Agree with me now. Thank me and good day!”
By Pete Moore On July 13th, 2016 at 10:00 pm
DAVID DAVIS MP as Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union. There’s a fancy job title for a flat-nosed working class boy. Talk about a job to get stuck into.
ConservativeHome ran his blueprint for re-joining the world last week. For now that has to be regarded as Plan A. We can go with Plan B after Boris Johnson has upset Johnny Continental in his job as Foreign Secretary. Yep, that’s the man who caused these headlines. And they say Theresa May has no sense of humour.
Davis says: “Once the European nations realise that we are not going to budge on control of our borders, they will want to talk, in their own interest.” He knows the score. In the end Berlin won’t damage German car makers so Poles can freely come to the UK.
By Pete Moore On July 13th, 2016 at 7:11 pm
THE LEFT used to love talking about Venezuela, back when Hugo Chavez was running the revolution and introducing price controls on food. How’s that working out?
BBC: Venezuela army deployed to control food production and distribution
Venezuela’s military has taken control of five ports in an effort to guarantee supplies of food and medicine.
In a decree, President Nicolas Maduro has ordered the army to monitor food processing plants, and co-ordinate the production and distribution of items.
Venezuela is going through a deep economic crisis despite having the world’s largest oil reserves.
The world’s largest oil supplies, and people are starving. Just think about that the next time some communist oik urges you to “resist capitalism”. At least it’s made Venezuelans forget that they can’t find toilet paper.
By Pete Moore On July 13th, 2016 at 6:33 pm
JOB DONE, no fuss, none of it written down. One out, one in. David Cameron went to Buckingham Palace a few minutes ago as the Prime Minister. He handed back the seals of office to their owner and left as a plain MP. A minute later Theresa May waltzed in and was invited by the Sovereign to form Her government. She is a mere servant, primus inter pares, first among equals in the Cabinet, but the sovereign authority of the British people rests elsewhere.
May then returned to Downing Street, where she spoke by warming over some Cameroon/Blairite mush. She’s not a socialist, but she’s an instinctive statist. I’m fed up with her already.
By Pete Moore On July 12th, 2016 at 7:56 pm
WELL, I could have a stab at describing goings on, but it’ll be out of date almost immediately. In short, it’s all the this –
Mentioning the death threats and bricked windows seems all so out of date, given that it was this morning. Oh, and the rearranged events due to death threats and the death threats referred to the Police. There’ll be a challenge against the leader, Corbyn, whose supporters are bricking and threatening anyone who opposes him.
UPDATE (and I haven’t posted this yet!): It’s red smoke. Corbyn is allowed to take part in the leadership contest. Which means Labour will fall apart just as fast as if he was forced off the ballot. In fact quicker. The party is done for, it’ll split.
If you have no idea what any of this means, don’t worry. The Labour Party tomorrow will look exactly like the picture again. Glorious.
By Pete Moore On July 12th, 2016 at 7:09 pm
BERNIE SANDERS has endorsed Hillary Clinton. The kiddies must be in tears. I thought he said the Democrat contest was going all the way to the convention. Talk about being led up the garden path. There’s your first lesson in politics – all but one politicans are liars, including supposed “outsiders” like Sanders.
They’ll talk all day long about how they’re principled, how they’re different, how they’re not part of the machine and about how they’ll change things. But when it suits they’ll all be willing to get on stage with possibly the most corrupt person who ever set foot in the White House (in the face of stiff competition). Sanders stood on that stage and said: “She will be the Democratic nominee for president, and I intend to do everything I can to make certain that she will be the next president of the United States.”
That’s the man who claimed to be “the anti-Wall Street candidate” speaking about the ultimate Wall Street candidate, whom his campaign described (rightly) as totally corrupt.
Gosh, what a shock.
By Pete Moore On July 12th, 2016 at 6:42 pm
IT’S not only a growing list of countries from around the world which are desperate to cut deals with a free, independent and sovereign UK, oh no. Big shot CEOs of Big shot multinationals are now rowing back on their empty threats.
Then: Brexit would make the UK a “less attractive” place for Siemens to do business
Now: “We’re here to stay,” Joe Kaeser, Siemens chief executive, said at an event at the House of Commons on Monday.“The UK matters with or without being a member of the EU. The Brexit vote will not diminish our commitment to your country.”
Someone ought to have reminded Herr Kaeser that we’ve faced German threats before, and that we blew a raspberry back at them also. If I weren’t so British I’m mention how proud I am of the many millions of bulldogs here, who now have big shot CEOs wishing that they hadn’t been co-opted by Remain losers.
Expect much more of this.
By Pete Moore On July 11th, 2016 at 6:48 pm
BE in no doubt, HM Gutter Press has chosen the next Prime Minister. It was The Times which finished off Andrea Leadsom. Normally I’d have heard Rupert Murdoch’s name invoked a good 600 times since lunchtime, but since Leadsom is anti-EU she was fair game for the unfair and total battering she received at the hands of the politico/media establishment over the weekend. So this is the Prime Minister who will deliver Brexit –
What’s done is done, but no rules were broken. We’re not Remainers, so we won’t be whining about it for weeks, demanding a re-run until we like the outcome. David Cameron must be wondering why he resigned. He’s pro-EU and had the balls to say so. Theresa May is pro-EU and went missing in action during the campaign. Her reward is his job.
Our job now is to hold her feet to the fire. If she takes advantage of the bullying if Leadsom by keeping on Osborne and the wets that Cameron filled his Cabinet with, it’s bad news. She has twice declared that “Brexit means Brexit”. If she even looks like rowing back then the Tory rank and file, already annoyed at being denied a say, will be off to UKIP and the Tories will kiss goodbye to thumping a laughably bad Labour Party in 2020.
Yes, 2020. There’s no constitutional or any other reason for a General Election to be held. We don’t elect Prime Ministers, and the Tories recieved a mandate 14 months ago to govern. Theresa May was a hopeless Home Secretary. I expect her to be an even worse PM.