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If only!

By Mike Cunningham On March 17th, 2013 at 1:35 pm

‘I nearly quit the Games over Locog’s penny pinching’:

 

What I want to know is why he didn’t stick to his ‘principles’ and quit? Was it because they weren’t his ‘pennies’?

Dulled Edges?

By Mike Cunningham On February 14th, 2013 at 9:10 am

Oscar is alleged to have been blind drunk when heading for his bedroom before the incident occurred.

 

Police have confirmed that Pistorius was, in fact, legless when detained.

Armed Forces…4 Hammond….0

By Mike Cunningham On August 13th, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Quotation from a letter sent to the Telegraph by the ‘Defence Secretary’:-

SIR – As the London 2012 Olympics draw to a close, I want to express my heartfelt thanks on behalf of the Government and of the British people to the men and women of our Armed Forces.

Their efficient, friendly and cheerful intervention to deliver security to the Games has been one of London 2012’s great successes. Not only has it ensured a safe and successful Games, but it has been the largest exercise in defence engagement since the Second World War, putting thousands of troops in direct contact with the citizens who pay for defence through their taxes.

We have been reminded that we can rely on these men and women not only to protect us from our enemies abroad, but also to provide resilience to our society at home.

Philip Hammond MP (Con)

Explanation, translation & commentary:-

The Armed Forces’ presence was actually determined by the singular failure of Group Four Services (G4S) to supply the guaranteed number of ‘security monitor staff’ as they (G4S) had relied on the old idea of paying the minimum possible wage to anyone who signed up, who had gone through the ludicrous ‘training procedure’ without actually bursting into gales of laughter, and had the added indignity of having a CRB check done on their whole background. When the volunteer security teams did attend for a trial, they found no planning, no place to sleep, no uniforms, no idea!

As was foreseen by anyone with more than single-figure IQ levels, the recruitment process dissolved into chaos, and the over-paid senior execs. of G4S, this massive public company went running, sobbing, to the Home Secretary a week before the Games were due to commence, to tell them that they hadn’t got more than a third of the numbers required; and of course, the whole Cabinet, from Cameron down to the bottle-washers of the Lib_Dems, thanked their lucky stars that Hammond hadn’t actually fired all the soldiers, marines and sailors that he, along with his predecessor Liam Fox, had originally wanted to.

The Soldiers, Marines, Sailors and Airmen who served during the Olympic Games venues did not volunteer, they were ordered to attend: cancelling holidays, leave, family commitments, and they did so because they are trained to obey lawful commands: they demonstrated that the Military can do more than is required, but to state that their intervention was cheerful is to write the lie in red ink.

The slashing of the Defence budgets is but yet another in the sins and signs which will be held against this stinking Coalition when at last they come to judgement at an Election, and it is also a judgement upon the voters of this Nation that one of the two main Parties will be returned to power, because those same voters do not think before casting their votes, but act like herded sheep, corralled by a mute sheepdog.

p.s. By the way, Mr. Hammond, the last time I checked, I am proud to own that I, along with you, are British Subjects of Her Majesty! If one accepts EU rulings, we may be termed ‘citizens’, but fortunately, not in my home!

 

 

 

LONDON PULLS IT OFF

By Pete Moore On August 12th, 2012 at 4:14 pm

Tell Mitt it’s all under control …

So the Olympic Games are closing this evening. Everyone involved can give themselves a well deserved pat on the back because they have been an undeniable, spectacular success. There were plenty of nay-sayers and grumblers, me among them, who desperately hoped that Paris would get them. Once the finger pointed at us I was sure, given the State’s record of delivering any major infrastructure projects late and well over budget, that we had London 2013 to look forward to.

I was also sure that the city’s infrastructure would crumble and collapse when the show got on the road; not an unreasonable prediction given the London Underground’s habit of breaking down every morning while traffic goes nowhere above. The solutions imposed weren’t satisfactory from a (classical) liberal view, but once London had the Games then they had to be delivered and make to work. Well they were delivered, and brilliantly so.

When even Sydneysiders are describing what London has done as “the greatest show on earth”, and “nothing short of magnificent” (here), when they’re proclaiming ” Well done you magnificent Pommy bastards” (here), and when they’re making a case for 2012 being the greatest Games ever staged (here), London must have got a few things right.

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WOMEN SHOULDN’T BE FIGHTING

By Pete Moore On August 9th, 2012 at 5:11 pm

Not happy about this.

Nicola Adams from Britain has just bagged the first female Olympic Gold medal in boxing, an achievement described as “historic” by the BBC. Close behind was Katie Taylor from Ireland who won Gold in her weight category. At around the same time, Jade Jones from Wales was defeating the top seed to win a place in the taekwondo final, by way of kicking her in the head alot.

Congratulations to them all, but they shouldn’t be there. Women are made for loving, pupping and nurturing, not fighting.

Yeah, I know, how dreadfully sexist and all that. Well if it’s sexist to regard the sight of young women battering each other as distasteful and nothing to cheer, that’ll be me.

Great(er) Expectations!

By Mike Cunningham On August 1st, 2012 at 10:29 am

Cast your minds back four years to the Olympics in Beijing. The Great Britain team, along with their supporters, were actually stunned to note that they had started winning medals. Bronzes, Silvers and finally Golds were being marked up to the most unlikely victor on the Planet. Used to the news that we were coming a gallant fifth, or worse, in sports and activities which we had invented, suddenly we were actually winning; or at least in the medals! From being a perennial no-hoper, especially in the Medal tables, Great Britain actually came fourth.

So what happens then? Suddenly, the boasts, the predictions, the headlines, all commenced emerging, and it was just like we something we had all seen and heard before. A full Century ago, a British politician saw votes, and more, in allowing the Royal Navy to equip itself with the latest Dreadnought battlecruiser, so as to establish parity with the resurgent German Navy; just across the North Seas. You can check the headlines in the newspapers; “We want eight, and we won’t wait!” So fast forward to this week, and a Sport England headline stating that 85 (eighty-five) medals was a number the Team GB should easily make was fast becoming a nightmare for the officials who had poured over £300 million in to the various sports bodies.

Apart from the simple truth that the Olympics is now a hell of along way away from the principles supported by Baron De Coubertin, is anyone really envisaging the ‘nightmare’ scenario that we, as a Nation, aren’t all that good at sporting activities? Can we honestly state that the very sight of a marshalled and machine-stamped product such as that 16 year-old Chinese swimmer is something we would wish to see inflicted upon any British child?

It is a very, very rare time when I am more than in full agreement with any BBC broadcaster, but for my money, Lynne Truss had it just about right, the medal target should have been FOUR, and anything else is and should be, a bonus for the whole country, not a disaster. After all, it is only a game!

Ring out, loud bells…

By Mike Cunningham On July 27th, 2012 at 9:56 am

So if we all shout as loudly as possible, shrieking encouragement all the while; whilst listening to all the bells from all over, it is a true sign that we are all ‘enjoying ourselves’, as well as being UNITED as the Home Nation for whatever? Especially as we are about to be ‘treated’ to three hours of ‘Great Britain’ as seen through the eyes and mind of Danny Boyle!

Nope, I have a great selection of Classical Music on my computer, as well as CDs by the rackful. I have a great selection of films both on DVD as well as on the hard drive of my recorder. I also have access to a hopefully hoop-free news broadcast from Aljazeera as well as the odd radio programme which remains uncontaminated by IOC frenzy. So, with my old friends Amadeus, Hector and Ludwig, I reckon I can survive without access to the smell or the roar!

Quote of the Century!

By Mike Cunningham On July 23rd, 2012 at 9:23 am

‘His Majesty’  has now arrived.

This is the limousine which will chauffeur him on the ‘Zil’ Lanes to the Olympic Park. This is the hotel he and all his colleagues will be staying at during the Games, all totally free of charge; and this is the Diplomatic Passport he carries, which gives him total immunity from arrest or prosecution from all crimes including murder.

So you can maybe understand my bemusement when, whilst being interviewed, most respectfully of course on the Today Programme, he said the magic line:-

 

“We work very hard; because after all, we are just ordinary working people”

 

 

Update on those ‘ordinary working people’ …Just like these!

Alternatives…

By Mike Cunningham On July 5th, 2012 at 10:20 am

I was buying some USB gear and some fibre-optic cable online this morning, and when I received the e-mail acknowledgement, I noticed an advert at the base of the page which offered coverage and speedy repair / replacement of my digital broadcast equipment in the specific case of losing viewing time during the Olympics.

 

Now if only there was a policy on offer which would guarantee I would not be bothered at all by the Olympics, that truly would be something I would buy!

Meanwhile….in Olympic-WorldSpeak…..

By Mike Cunningham On June 29th, 2012 at 5:27 pm

And no-one even guessed that this might happen; ever? And the bleeding events themselves have not even commenced!