web analytics

The Disease

By Patrick Van Roy On October 10th, 2019

The list of explicatives I want to utter here would melt my keyboard…..

I just got news a Friend of mine died. He had over 30yrs clean and sober. He had a good life, a family, a damn good job he went out used and died.  Now I’m sure he didn’t just arrive at this point he had to build up to it. His life had to be falling apart on some level and he didn’t reach out, didn’t seek help.

It’s certainly not like he didn’t know how, he was a D&A Counselor.  This disease is the devils, it leaves a stain on your soul that you’re never free of.  Not everyone that Drinks or get’s High is an addict, but everyone who does has the potential to get addicted. Addiction is the physical embodiment of Despair. Anyone can know despair addiction is despair that hasn’t been treated manifesting in the person physically.

I don’t know what my friends despair was, so that’s my failure as a friend. Someone had to know something though, hell he had to know it was his job to see it in others.

I’ve been blessed in my life I’ve known the famous and the failures of the world. I’ve spent time in Hell and made it to the otherside, but far from unscathed. Hope, Faith, Honesty no human can live nor can they deal with their despair without these 3 elements. Somewhere after 30yrs he forgot that.

We deal with the Disease One Day at a Time. We accept that no matter what we believe we have no control over the pains that come with being alive, We accept that we can’t do it ourselves, and We accept that help.  Once afflicted with the disease those are the 3 cornerstones of your life or you die.

It can be done, some who were never expected to live have and have been gifted not always with prosperity of the wallet, but prosperity in life.  The prosperity of love and family.

A success so far of living your life this way is Joe Walsh.  Walsh one of the most gifted guitarists in the world was a maniac in his addiction. He hit his bottom on Air on the Howard Stern show. He and Don Henley had a full blow out broadcast for the world. Walsh had been on a 4 day binge.  One of his only friends Ringo Star heard the meltdown and snatched him up and into a rehab.  That was a little over 20yrs ago. Walsh with the help of Star has maintained his sobriety, he’s even married to Ringo’s sister in Law….

I guess my reason for that paragraph was to show that with little hope, faith and help from our friends we can all make it.

Thanks for your indulgence.


16 Responses to “The Disease”

  1. Sorry to hear.

    If you care to say, what drug did he use?

    It’s not your failure as a friend. Sometimes you just don’t know.

    Addiction / drug abuse scares me so much. None of our societies are doing enough to understand it and deal with it.

  2. Thanks Phantom


    I’ll be off for a few hours gotta take a ride.

  3. God bless.

  4. Sorry to read this. Sad and scary.

  5. Sincerely sorry for your loss Pat.

    Heroin destroys all and everything in it’s path. Individuals, families, freindships, communities. Everything.

  6. Good post. Condolences on the lost friend. It’s true what you’ve said here before: curing the addiction isn’t the victory, that comes only when you cure the root cause of it, and that’s a much harder, sometimes impossible, task.
    Probably often the best you can achieve is to get people to learn to accept their suffering, see it as something that makes sense out of their life.

    // with the help of Star ….
    to show that with little … help from our friends//

    I hope that was intended!


  7. Thank you all for your sentiments

  8. yes Noel it was intentional

    The guy who passed was a friend that at one point I spent a lot of time with him and one other guy. Our friend died and I got sober and later I got the gentleman who passed away into rehab and then into the field.

    He and I were hanging one night and the story of Moon, Walsh, and Star came up. The 3 of them were close. They would go on wild binges, Then Moon died Ringo got Sober and he saved Walsh… he said it was our story. I laughed and said it can’t be neither of us have any talent.

    It was a good memory that popped into my head when I got the news.

    We only live with a little help from our friends…. one day at a time.

  9. Sorry for your loss Patrick.

  10. thanks Charles

    I hope you are well.

  11. PVR

    Sorry to hear of your friend’s death. It is difficult and can leave us feeling helpless, but we never know what is really in another person’s heart and soul. Prayers will not make things worse but may make things better in some ways.

  12. Sorry for your loss Patrick.

  13. thanks Dave and NYr….. The shock hit me when I got the call the anger hasn’t yet but the prayer is constant.

    Usually every weekend I go spend with my mother to help her out, this weekend I’ll be bouncing between moms house and his. There are things that need to be done.

  14. There are apparently a fair number of functioning heroin users, presumably addicts, who can maintain a normal lifestyle for quite a long time.

    This is a side of the thing that I hadn’t thought of much before.

    And I guess any of these people were always susceptible to making a mistake leading to an overdose.

    And now that the ( cheaper ) fentanyl is often mixed in with heroin, in strengths unknowable to the user, overdoses are more common.

  15. I’ll be spending my time this weekend trying to piece together what happened.

  16. Good morning/afternoon

    Yesterday was very hard day. If I get testy with anyone today please let me know. It will not be intentional.