5 3 mins 7 yrs

We are told of the ‘horrifying’ video which shows a tourist getting mauled and killed by a lion a few days ago. We’re also told that the lioness went right in to the car, and savaged the tourist.

Strangely enough, we were also told that ‘there were no plans to destroy the animal’.

Now this is why I tend to get a bit annoyed with the reporting, and the twist, or ’spin’ that somehow it was the lion’s fault. Rubbish, the lioness was just doing exactly what she was supposed to do, a bloody terrifying, bloodthirsty carnivorous animal with her instincts running from aeons ago: a huntress, a stalker, a curious animal which can run at 60 m.p.h.; and comes equipped with claws 1 ½ “ long sheathed in paws the size of your head, and a set of razor-sharp teeth in a mouth where the jaws can exert 650 pounds of pressure.

If the people who drive along with their windows open get into trouble; it is exactly their own fault. The driver, for heaven’s sake, was a Lion Park employee. There are signs all over the bloody place telling anyone who can read that lions kill people, so keep your bloody windows up.

I have been around similar set-ups both in South Africa and in England, and the one thing you do before entering the lion enclosure is make certain that not only the windows are all closed tight, but also the doors are all locked. We had a lioness jump up and sit on the bonnet of our car as we had slowed right down, but I wasn’t worried, because the lioness couldn’t open the doors: because people are smarter than lions; not quicker, but smarter.

The Lion Park had three attacks in four months; but neither the Lion Park nor the lions were at fault; it was all down to the stupid bastards who simply know better than the experts, the ones who just know that they can get a quick photo before that nice cuddly lioness gets too close and ………………..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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5 thoughts on “Don’t eat the people in the cars!

  1. For a start, I think they should stop calling these vast, wild areas of African grassland..”Parks”.

    For visitors unfamiliar with the dark continent, this conjures up images of a ‘recreational’ area with herbaceous borders and carefree families strolling around with gran & grandad.
    They should be called what they are — wild animal reserves.

  2. Bernard,

    You are slightly incorrect. The Kruger park is a truly vast expanse, covering literally hundreds of square miles; close to the border with Mozambique. The Lion Park is sited in a suburb of Johannesburg, close to their target audience. There is another Park in Krugersdorp, which is where we went; bit larger, but much the same.

  3. it’s called thinning the herd or improving the gene pool. If you’re to stupid to keep your window rolled up when it’s the only thing between you and the man eating Lion then you did the species a favor by self removal of your genes from the pool.

  4. The Troll, on June 9th, 2015 at 4:32 PM Said:
    it’s called thinning the herd or improving the gene pool

    Ah, that would be the reason Muslims spend an awful amount of their free time slaughtering other Muslims.

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